An unforeseen honor

 It was cold and dark in the dawn of days that I did not know would go on. I knew that summer days would come again, and these were new because until just weeks earlier, we were told that they would not. We were told that the world as we knew it, was over.

Photo by NASA on Unsplash

As the final summer passed, I listened to warnings coming in from the sky and fortified my position. Every move I could make to prepare would only temporarily hold me, in the long term, if what they were saying was true, I would be swept away anyway. I tried not to think of it that way, because if I did, it made my efforts seem like a waste of my last days.

As I watched the clock, the new day began in Kiribati, the eternal land of tomorrow. Hardly a test considering a land that boasts the only one to exist in all 4 hemispheres. But, then Te Araroa, Byron Bay, Tokyo, Busan, and as the hours passed, yes here. There was a year ahead, after all, many of them! What would we do? What will happen? The sun began to rise and everything was filled with great hope.

To this day, as to the events in the world that have taken place since, I look at the aftermath and wonder if we won or lost that day. That however was different from what I was thinking about though. Our magnificent human tendency to become self-absorbed once again took over and left the deeper cuts of the world behind. In doing so, I rushed into an indiscriminate building and found myself outside the facade that we live in.

With so many intense points of self-absorption firing around me, I found treasures within the treasure, and of course, did not know it. In that, I learned about a warrior. Yet she was just one of us. If you looked closely, she had all the strengths and qualities we could ever want ourselves. She was a model of using those strengths, selfless, unsuffering, and bold. The warrior, was just there, with us, like she always was, is now, and always will be.

With all her honor, she guided and protected a village that no man could measure. She loved her life, always knowing, always sure, never wavering. Always moving forward, never visibly adjusting to the limitations slapping us all. She never broke stride, never let us down. We knew but, did not know, that she was raising and teaching us all. 

Just as it comes to pass for all of us and the great people before us, time, the predator calls for an accounting that none of us can pay. Our beautiful warrior even walked through this final storm with unparalleled grace. The finest brand of defiance is certainly a true and full heart.

It is only right that all those she loved be with her, never wavering, always there, never letting her be unaccounted for. It is something she’s always been. To be such a beautiful leader by the love in one’s heart is a unique thing and one that is not widely taught. This was always her goal. She would never be left alone, for what she gave us would take years to understand and even then, how could we completely?

As she closed her eyes for the last time she knew that for all of those she left behind, they knew she was only sleeping. In a moment awareness will come and she will know where she is. Sleep well, our beloved warrior, you taught us well.

This is a hard piece for me to write. It reminds me of all of the people I have taken for granted in my life. We can be blessed in all the important things and still be clueless until a reckoning comes. I keep asking myself why, but my answer never seems to come.

All I have is what I had in the past to ponder and glean from hoping I apply it in her honor tomorrow. I still desire to listen to her tell me a thousand stories, because her heart is in all of them. There is boldness and great wisdom. It is about this time that I realize, the stories are in all who were there for her at the end of the day and scattered throughout the land. This is her story, this time, I need to be present.

The music starts to slow down and the house grows oddly quiet. A barrier in time weakens, allowing the passage across a line that is usually impossible to cross. The night we could never have imagined has arrived. What has happened in the last few months will take years to understand. In the end, we are thankful. Our warrior taught us so much and will keep teaching us because that is who she was.  Each of us in our own way will do our best to live up to how hard she worked, never wavering, always there, honoring her.

at July 07, 2024